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 | Dec 29, 2003 - FAT CHICKS RULE | Spitfire  | 
| | First of all...
GEORGE TAKAI DOES NOT KNOW WHAT I DID LAST SUMMER!!
Second of all, I hope you all remember to attend my super awesome Dog Pound-free new years party this Wednesday night.
Now, you can truley let loose and show the world how crazy you really are without the pressure of having to act nice around Steven (This was the #1 complaint from last year).
ALSO - although this year is 100% cocaine-free, mention my website and you will possibly receive a mini pitcher filled with some sort of alchohol-based substance and a complementary
jello shooter. All I can say, is
PLEASE bring mix because we are going to be short!
Alright...now that I've spread the good news, I'd like to point out that I love beautiful women. I don't know what it is about beautiful women, but they're just hot. However,
I do have a somewhat different taste in women than do many of my friends. Nothing too out of the ordinary, but while many guys are fantasizing about Lucy Lui, Cameron Diaz,
Christina Aguilera, etc....I prefer my fantasy women with a little more meat on them. No, I'm not in love with fat chicks....at least not really fat chicks :). I prefer to keep my eyes on
more curvy full-figured women like Drew Barrymore, Kate Winslet, and
Jennifer Lopez (ok, J-Lo). Although these girls are by no means fat, they have enough meat to give them some seriously sexy curves. Why am I bringing this up all of a sudden? Well I somehow
came across this webpage praising 'big women'. I'm glad to see he uses Kate as an example of a perfect shaped
woman :)
Seriously though, I don't agree with 100% of what this guy is saying, but I thought it was interesting how he credits the typically homosexual-dominated fashion industry for the showcasing
of very thin, boyish figured young looking women.
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Maybe he's onto something there? I also thought it was interesting about how you always see these women posing at uncomfortable looking angles,
to create the illusion that they have femine curves. This could definately explain why so many female pop celebrities look much better in photo shoots and videos than they do in 'surprise'
public shots....there are a few exceptions of course. However - when you look back at how long this trend has been around, it really hasn't been that long. Throughout the 30s, 40s and 50s full-figured
healthy looking curvy women were considered the most attractive - I guess I just have to wait for the trend to come around again!
Anyhow...gotta run out and eat. So feast your eyes on the next installment of Protein Man....that should keep you busy for awhile.
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 | Dec 23, 2003 - Merry X-Mas!? | Spitfire  | 
| | Almost Christmas....has everyone got their shopping done? For the first time ever I think I'm actually done shopping BEFORE christmas eve. Now I can just sit back
and wait to celebrate the big J's birthday. I've decided, based on other recent birthday traditions, that on the 25th I should down 5 mini-pitchers of holy water.
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Aaaanyhow, Dog Pound's bday bash last weekend went really well! I managed to meet my previous record of 5 minipitchers,
unfortunately drinking 3 rum&coke's before the bar prevented me from breaking the record....but it was good times besides! Since I don't really have any pictures of the night myself,
I've included a picture of Greg Prediger taking a leak in somebody's gastank the next morning after he woke up on somebody's lawn hungover. The funny thing is, he wasn't even
at the party. Good times!
I do remember giving Shea Adonis a hard time about drawing some additional comics for the website, and he actually did! In fact I have two of them now, and let me tell you - they
are gold material. I'll post the first one today so check it out!
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For those of you who like to see large military vehicles crashing (Dog Pound) - here's what happens when your helicopter doesn't quite
make the landing on the aircraft carrier. Youch...
Oh well, Merry Christmas and all that stuff if I don't update before then....have a good one. Afterwards make sure to rest up for the big New Years party at my place. For a look at how crazy it *could* be,
have a look at the update from last year...w00t!
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 | Dec 18, 2003 - Too many updates in one month! | Spitfire  | 
| | Well, Dog Pound's birthday is coming up, and if there is one birthday you are going to remember this year it is going
to be his (thats a fact). Soul_d has even prepared a special flash video for the occasion
so have a look - all the details are there.
And if you would like to see a breif sample of what will be happening on Saturday, take a look at this comic drawn by none other than Unit3.
And last but not least - please visit this webpage for some hilarious xmas flash adventures. DO IT. And don't
let the cute faces fool you, they are really horribly evil little tree animals.
I guess that's it...for those who don't already know, I will be hosting a New Years bash this year. There will be some special guests attending, including Kujo from the
wintery lands of Morinville, and myself. What else could you ask for? Unfortunately Dog Pound won't be making it this year, but that just means we will have to
destroy him this Saturday.
I believe our friend redbandana ha agreed to make a few jello shooters for the party, while I am promising to be serving some Vodka-special minipitchers
to all those you want some. JayB has also promised to beat the crap outta some guy at the party that he doesn't know....so if you don't know JayB....
COME ON DOWN!!
Aight!
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 | Dec 15, 2003 - My friend Barb is one double-bacon genious burger | Spitfire  | 
| | Ok, this is it. I have found the webpage of all webpages! Where other sites are bloated with limitless verbal backwash, sunken amidst confusing
clickables and doubiously dapper do-dads, this webpage that I have found excels where the others have so gloriously failed. Just think about compressing
all of the knowledge of this planet into less than a quarter of a page of regular sized scrawl; then pluck from it the one useful fragment of wisdom which outshines all of the rest,
the one nugget of information which sums it ALL up....then place it on the web for all to see....
I bring you, my loyal readers, to the last webpage you will ever need to visit. Yep, thats it.
And with that I'd might as well retire my own webpage, for I can no longer be certain that I maintain the most rockingest webpage in the world. And yet I will not, if for no other reason
than to express my utter contempt and jealousy towards the creator of this dot com masterpiece. A pox on his family and all who dwell beneath his roof, I don't care if he lives in a church.
Well...that was pretty much all I wanted to update about.
If you'd like something to read - especially you fellow geeks, check out this article about
a technology IBM is developing using self-assembling micro-processors. Interesting stuff!
Now go play this addicting helicopter game. My high score is 2132 - beat it!
And thats it, no pictures or videos....somebody draw a comic!
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 | Dec 01, 2003 - Catching Up | Spitfire  | 
| | December is here at last, at that means its time to do my monthly update. Usually during winter I'm much more frequent about my updates, but I suppose I've managed to find enough other things to
keep me busy with that I haven't really been bothered to put too much effort into the site. Nevertheless, with such great readers as yourselves - I can't avoid it forever!
I'd like to start off today by drawing your attention to the comic of the day submitted by none other that Shea Adonis himself. I'm hoping
Shea will continue to send in comics of this awesome calliber in the future, so that I have something to replace the endless supply of Dick-Mouth comics
submitted by soul_d on a regular basis.
Someone forwarded me this funny Australian beer commercial the other day and it made me laugh, so I'd better post it. I just think its hillarious when the guy
opens the beer on his head and his friend smacks his back to knock the cap off - I really have to try that. And since we have beer covered, here's a great truck video that
Shane sent to me last week...some of you have probably already seen it, but its worth another watch. And to finish off the content for the guys, here's a boob picture...go packers!
On the right you will see a very proud, happy man. You might think this is because he beat anorexia, or perhaps because he's finally managed to grow a full, hearty porn-stache - but the real reason is because he finally had
the courage to grab a handful of his best friend's ass....and for that split second, my friend, this man was truley the king of the world.
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Everyone should know that December is the month of birthdays....this month will be full of celebrations, starting tomorrow (Monday) when we will be getting together to celebrate Ian's special day. Next weekend a bunch of us
will be making the trip down to Wascana to show the queen city what is means to celebrate G-Hump day. Once we get back, we will have a full 2 weeks to get ready for Dog Pound's
annual drunk-fest birthday, leading into the next week when we celebrate the birthday of the biggest party animal of them all - Jesus. Also somewhere in there will be Fredish's birthday
but I'm not sure when she wants to have it. Also happy birthday to Bruce, Brian and my brother Mat, That's all I can think of right now but that should do...
Hmmm, uhh.... hmmm.....well, can't think of much more to say.
Guess that means the update is over! Hoo-hah!
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