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Dr. Razor - the man, the skid, the center of everything that is etheral


1. full name: Doctor "Kim" Razor
2. date of birth: Probably long before anyone else reading this...
4. hair color? None
5. eye color? Blue
6. height: 6'0
7. weight: 210 lbs
8. favorite toothpaste? Hair of the Dog
9. where do you live?: S'toon
10. school?: No thanks, I'm full...
11. sibs: 2 brothers
12. nickname: Razor, Doc
13. bf/gf? No, my wife would kill me....
14. close friends: Frog, Walnut, Ali, Fluffy, Twinkie (yeah i know, it sounds like the fuckin muppets or somethin)
15. funniest person you know? either JayB or Spitfire
16. favorite shampoo/ conditioner? Beer is good for your hair right?
17. favorite perfume/cologne: I couldn't name one if I wanted to
18. do you make fun of people? Always...mostly Larmal...
19. whats your dream car? One just like George Jetson's...
20. piercings: Not since I was a stupid teenager....
21. favorite ice cream: cold
22. favorite soda: Beer
23. when is your bedtime? ...What is this bedtime of which you speak?
24. favorite book: does the back of a cereal box count?
25. have you ever broken a bone? Yeah, but she had it coming....
26. ever cheated on a test? Only a pregnancy test....
27. do you believe in love at first sight? only girls and fags believe in that shit, and I'M NO FAG!
28. do you consider yourself a hopeless romantic or blah romantic? hey, I'M NO FAG!!!
29. are you into PDAS? see 28
30. pool or hot tubs? Showers
31. thunderstorms- exciting or deadly? BOTH, the sound of fresh rain run-off splashing from the roof reminds me of the sound of fresh blood splashing off the wall and floor.
32. tall or short? if yer talking Beer mugs, i'd have to say tall
33. when was the last time you took a shower? see 31
34. do you have aol? I used to, I was HORNYSLUT344368 but I quit cuz of all the fags that kept trying to cyber with me.
35. best feeling in the world: LOTS OF BEER
36. worst feeling in the world: LOTS OF BEER
37. if you could change one thing about the past what would it be? Starting this fucking quiz...
38. do you have braces? no, but I have a cock-ring
39. if you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? I wish I were more sensitive and more in touch with my feelings...NAH, FUCK THAT, I'M NO FAG!!!
40. who is your role model? Shaggy from Scooby-Doo
41. favorite fast food restaurant: McD's
42. least favorite fast food place: I love all unhealthy food that is fast and cheap...
43. where did you go to elementary school? ...what are you? a fuckin cop?
44. what is your most humiliating moment? see 43
45. guys, with or without hats? Only fags wear hats (and have hair)
46. favorite soundtrack: The voices in my head...
47. 1st thought when you wake up in the morning: either 1) "Oh no, not again..." 2) "Where the hell am I?" or 3) "aw shit, now I gotta buy more beer."
48. where do you see yourself in 10 years? Probably still doing this fucking quiz...
49. what religion are you? ummm...undecided
50. favorite number(s)? 667-5309
51. do you like the phone or computer better? Phones are for fags, and Computers Suck...
52. ever had an online relationship? Do those 1-900 numbers count?
53. when was the last party you went to? This quiz IS a fuckin party...
54. when was the best party ever? A party I threw for my wife's (then gf) 19th B'day (what little I remember of it anyway)
55. most romantic thing ever done for you: My wife once brought me a beer...*sniff, sniff*
56. high school nicknames: Doc, Razor
57. boxers or briefs: hey, I'M NO FAG!!!
58. favorite teacher: ahhh television...teacher, friend, secret lover....
59. least favorite teacher: well, an ex-gf of mine taught me quite a bit about sex...but she turned out to be a two-timing slut (go figure!)
60. favorite web site: http://rblords.com/~razor
61. do you sleep with a stuffed animal? I once fucked a fat chic....
62. 1 pillow or 2? 1 for me and 15 for my wife (so she stops stealing mine)
63. is the glass half empty or half full? just a sec...... now Its fuckin empty, go get me another beer!
64. pets/names: Do crab lice count?
65. do you get along with your parents? as much as I get along with anybody...
66. job: currently looking
67. hobbies: Drinking
68. best advice ever given: If your friend is already dead, and being eaten by vultures, It's okay to feed some bits of your friend to one of the vultures, to teach him to do some tricks. But ONLY if you're serious about adopting the vulture.
69. words/phrases you use to much: "ehhhHHHHH!!!"
70. coolest experience(s): When I lived back in the Wild West days, instead of carrying a six-gun in my holster, I'd carry a soldering iron. That way, if some smart-aleck cowboy said something like, "Hey look. He's carrying a soldering iron!" and started laughing, and everybody else started laughing, I'd just say, "That's right, it's a soldering iron. The soldering iron of justice." Then everybody would get real quiet and ashamed, because they made fun of the soldering iron of justice, and I'd hit them up for a free drink.
71. scariest experience(s): I remember one day I was at Grandpa's farm and I asked him about sex. He sort of smiled and said, "Maybe instead of telling you what sex is, why don't we go out to the horse pasture and I'll show you." So we did, and there on the ground were my parents having sex.
73. favorite summer activity: Drinking
74. have you ever gone skinny dipping?: Yes
75. fave amusement park ride: The Beer Tent
76. special skills or talents: Quarters
77. ever feel like you want to move out from your parents and live on your own: No, but my wife made me...
78. characteristics you look for in a girl: A nympho that loves to cook and clean....
79. favorite food: BEER
80. least favorite food: American Beer
81. favorite vacation: well, currently being unemployed is "kinda" like a vacation...except for all that "looking for a job" shit...
82. favorite subject: BEER
83. ever wonder why men have nipples? hey man, I'M NO FAG!!!
84. favorite movies: Star Wars, The Matrix, and any movie with lots of pointless sex and violence...
85. favorite part of your face: My eye boogers (I have a collection)
86. favorite tv shows: dunno, I never watch a whole show, I just flip
87. do you feel comfortable totally naked? nah, I have to be wearing at least one sock (or my cock-ring)
88. favorite music: almost anything that is NOT Country, mostly 80's metal :)
89. if you were stranded on a desert island and had food and water and other basic necessities, what two things would you bring along: A TV crew and 16 other people (then I would sell the show to FOX)
90. favorite animals: Dead cow (preferably with special sauce, lettuce, cheese, onions, pickles, on a sesame seed bun)
91. what are you most afraid of?: Clowns, I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus and a clown killed my dad.
92. favorite day of the week: Friday
93. have you ever had a near death experience?: There were times when I was very close to death...(but no "GO TO THE LIIIGHHHHTTTT..." shit)
95. favorite things to wear: Jeans and a t-shirt... I'M NO FAG!!!
96. what part of yourself are you most self-conscious of?: my vagina...
97. favorite part of the newspaper: the chewy chocolate center
98. would you rather do a math problem or write a poem?: Math, I'M NO FAG!!!
99. sex before or after marriage: before and after sounds right... everyone knows there's none DURING the marriage...
100. pro-life or pro-choice: Pro-Stars, the breakfast cereal of champions
101. ever tried drugs: fuck off, narc...
102. do you drink?: Does the Pope shit in the woods?
103. ever had your heart broken?: If by broken you mean having my heart torn into tiny little fucking pieces by a pice-of shit, low-life SLUT, WHORE, TWO-TIMING, SKANKY BITCH, WHO I HOPE GETS A NASTY FUCKING TROPICAL DISEASE THAT EATS AWAY AT HER SKIN FROM THE INSIDE.......then..uh...yes
104. are you happy with the way things are going right now in your life? I'll be happier when I'm done this quiz
105. favorite jelly belly flavor: jelly belly??? That not some kinda fuckin FAG THING is it?
106. what is the most important thing in your life?: Beer!!! (uhh..oh yeah, and my wife and son...)
107. dominant hand: The one I don't usually type with ;-)
108. favorite color?: Blurry
110. parents' names?: You are a fuckin cop ain't ya??
111. what do you want to be?: Drunk...
112. how many kids do you want to have? I just hope they let me keep the one I've got
113. when do you want to get married? 10 years from now......doh! aw shit...
114. if you could meet one famous person, who would it be? uhhh...I hear Monica Lewinsky puts out...
115. say one nice thing about the person that sent this thing to you: Spitfire is not a complete Fag.


Razor